DON'T CLEAN THOSE NETS YET!
It was one of those days. Have you ever had one? I was doing a really GREAT job of feeling sorry for myself. I had stepped out, big time for me, and felt like I failed. Instead of chalking it up to experience, picking myself up, and watching the dust spin off in the sunbeams, I indulged my self-pity. This wound up creating a serious problem of self-inflicted emotional wounding that spiraled out of control. It got so bad that I questioned my identity, my calling, and even told God that I thought His dream for my life was a nightmare to me. YIKES!
My husband was AMAZING through this process; he never showed anything but love and support. Now, looking back, I know I must have been driving him crazy (sorry!). His words and kindness helped, and I hate to admit it, but despite his encouragement, I kept on spiraling inside. Eventually, I got myself to the point where I began to view others’ actions through my insecurities and decided everyone else shared my same, warped, perspective. This led me to feel as though I had nothing of value to offer. And it didn’t stop there, it got worse. Not only did feel as though I have nothing of value to offer, I actually began to feel as though anything I did have was only worthy of being reviled.
Okay, now, that’s a little scary. And here’s what’s even scarier: I think this ugly, twisted thinking happens to a lot of us way more than what we realize and/or want to admit to anyone…including ourselves. In this instance, I had myself so worked up, I couldn’t see anything clearly, well, except the lies…those were crystal clear. But my point is that this happened because I had gotten my eyes off of God’s truth and God’s perspective. I had even told God that I thought His ideas were no good! As I type this, I am literally shaking my head, because it seems so ludicrous now. Yet at the time (and I hate to admit this wasn’t as long ago as I would perhaps like it to be), it felt SO REAL and SO STRONG. That’s one reason why lies are so dangerous. When we believe them, we actually think they’re true. Lies that we see as deceptive have no power, but if we align our minds with them, they hold us captive until we see (recognize and believe) the truth, God’s truth.
Anyway, here I was, having had one of those days. And of course I was! I had allowed lies to first grip my emotions, then dominate my thoughts, and then control my perspective. When lies are in control, I promise you, they don’t like to stay in the realm of your emotions and feelings; they want to control your mindsets and perspectives. And when lies are in control, “those days” will come…a lot! But, getting back to this particular day, I opened our family devotional book and began to read.
This particular devotion highlighted the story of the failed fishing trip of Simon Peter and friends. These fishermen weren’t doing something unfamiliar. They were doing something they knew how to do. It was totally up their alley, I mean, they used to do this for a living, but on this day, they failed. I’m sure they did everything “just right,” and yet there they were, on the shore, with dirty, empty nets.
I’m not sure what they were thinking, or talking about, as they went through the nets, section by section, cleaning and mending. I imagine they were frustrated, disappointed, grieving, and now this, a failed fishing trip.
Then Jesus enters the scene and tells them to stop cleaning their nets, go out against all odds, and cast those nets into the sea. Yes, I know you are professionals in this area, and yes, I know you were just up all night. Yes, I know you just put all this labor into this failed venture, but DO IT AGAIN! Get out there; undo all the cleaning work you’ve done so far, reject your natural inclinations, and TRY AGAIN! Why? Because I asked you to.
And what did they do? They decided to trust Him. I have no idea why, perhaps it had something to do with all the miracles they just witnessed, including the healing of Simon Peter’s mother-in-law. Regardless of their reasoning, they did what Jesus asked; they went out there and cast their nets again. This was a strange, but not spectacular, action, and what happened?
God did something miraculous! God worked the extraordinary through their ordinary. As I read the devotional to my girls, God spoke into my heart. He said, “Don’t clean your nets yet. Cast your nets out there again, put yourself out there and trust Me.” And you know what? I did it. In small ways to start, but in that moment something broke in my mind, and I began to shift my eyes to God’s truth and align myself with His perspective. I realized how limited my perspective is compared to His. Realigning myself with His perspective and plans was a process, but as I did, hope and faith returned. No, it’s not time to clean the nets, it’s time to trust God and see what He can do with ordinary acts that are in obedience to His voice. It’s time to stop only doing what makes sense to our logic and playing into our areas of comfort and trust God, step out in obedience, and see what the grace and power of God can do in our lives!
So, here’s the challenge: in what areas of my life am I cleaning my nets? What is God asking me to do? What steps do I take to obey (even if I don’t feel like it)? Remember, God takes our ordinary actions of obedience and creates something extraordinary. Be blessed!