Smash Your Jar for Jesus

Recently, I went to an evening church service with a friend. Wow! The worship time was so powerful, and the sweet, amazing presence of God could be felt on a whole new level. During the worship, God asked me a question, “Do you love your fear more than Me?”

My response? “Of course not, God.”

“Then give it to Me.”

“No problem, God. Here it—” Umm…problem. There was immediate, heart-rending, gut-wrenching pain. What?! But I HATE my fear, I dream of living a life free from its ugly claws. Yet here I was, struggling to turn it over.

“It’s just like the alabaster jar.”

“Now I’m REALLY confused, God.” That’s when He began to show me things I had never thought of before.

To begin with, the alabaster jar from the story in Mark 14 (or Luke 7) contained expensive
perfume, and this woman was “sinful.” In other words, she most likely earned the money to purchase something so costly in a way that was less than God-honoring. She worked very hard doing things that were not in line with God’s way in order to possess this precious jar with its precious contents. It was hers. And it had cost her dearly…and not just in money. She had every reason to hold onto it for the value it represented to her. Perhaps there were choices she made just to earn a little bit more to put toward the jar. Perhaps there were choices she made after she bought the jar just because she had it. Maybe it represented a way out of her current life situation.  We aren’t told why she bought it, how long she had it, or exactly what she did to
get it. All we know is that she has it.

Now this unnamed woman takes this oh-so-precious jar, breaks it, and pours out the contents onto Jesus’s feet. It’s gut-wrenching, and she weeps while she does it. She takes
this precious item, purchased at great personal cost, and sacrifices it at His feet.

This is exactly what God was asking me to do. Take something I have spent a lifetime of effort on…my fear, my alabaster jar…and give it to Him. This fear is something that I clung to even though it cost me a lot over the course of my life. It’s something I have treated as precious and allowed to drive my decision-making process, even though there were better options; options that would have promoted personal growth and faith and possibly growth and faith for others as well. It was time to take my fears and insecurities and pour them out at His feet.

I decided to do a little research on fear. And as it turns out, when fear is activated in the
brain, there are a whole lot of neural centers that go off. Some are for processing and others for decision-making. One study specifically looked at decision-making, and saw that people who made fear-based decisions would forgo better opportunities and advantages in order to avoid something they were afraid of. But these same people were able to overcome the bully of fear through intentional exposure to what they were afraid of. In other words, by choosing
to confront their fear, its grip began to slip.

Other studies have shown that the amygdala (auto-brain) is activated in a fear response. And how in the world do we deal with auto-brain? After all, it’s too fast for us to corral with logic, completing its race down our neural pathways before we can even blink. Well, God gave us an incredible tool…meditation. Meditation increases our auto-brain’s connection to centers of control. No wonder God encourages us to meditate on His Word, His deeds, and who He is!

We aren’t helpless when faced with internal bullies like fear. We can choose to use the
tools God has given us, like meditation and controlled, intentional exposure to help us overcome. And we can also choose to recognize when we are actually holding onto it for some reason. Perhaps it’s a way that we feel safe (weird, I know), or maybe we’ve become so accustomed to it that we don’t know how to function without it (scary co-dependence). Whatever the reason, fear is never from God; He does not want us to cower and cave. He wants to empower us; He wants us to stand strong!

During that worship service, I realized that in a sick, twisted way, I actually wanted fear. This was so deep, so subconscious, I don’t think I would have ever realized it if God hadn’t asked
me to give it up as my alabaster jar. I didn’t realize that I had worked so hard to grow and keep something that was so clearly not of God. I didn’t realize that I was clutching it as much as it was clutching me. So that night, I smashed it and poured it out before Him. No more!

So, what’s your alabaster jar? What’s something you’re holding onto that’s holding you back? Or, maybe it’s something in your life that is less than God’s best for you. Maybe, like me, it’s fear, but it could be something completely different. I challenge you to pray, search your heart and mind, and smash it at His feet.

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