It’s just not going to happen. The dreaded thought finally formed in my mind. I had been trying to shut it out and silence it for a couple of weeks, but reality has a way of barging in anyway.

It was Christmastime. The time I look forward to seeing family members I don’t get to see at any other time in the year. It’s a time to eat delicious stuffing, homemade cranberry dishes, and the most amazing gingerbread men and cream puffs and sing Christmas songs for hours in the car while we eagerly anticipate hugs and a year’s worth of story swapping.

The car. That was the problem. Actually TWO cars were the problem. One was way overdue for expensive maintenance we just didn’t have the money for before Christmas due to other, large, unforeseen expenses and the other decided to have mysterious tire issues. Since they had been bald for over a year at this point, we decided to go ahead and purchase new tires for it. The problem was…the appointment was slated for after Christmas. The weather would have to be perfect for us to be able to head north and make it up over the mountains safely, assuming the tire would hold air long enough to make the hassle of refilling it worthwhile.

My mind just didn’t want to accept that my two trusty old cars just weren’t quite so trusty anymore. But I had to. Remember, reality? Barging in? Yeah…

So we called it. No trip. Not this year. I cried. I was so disappointed. Then, I had an idea! I recalled a recent conversation I had had with a friend who said that she and her daughter were going to be alone for Christmas. Yes! This was perfect! I dialed the number and invited them over for Christmas dinner.

There were more tears. But not mine this time. This is an answer to prayer, she said. I was floored, moved by the wondrous wisdom and love of our Lord.

How awesome is God?! I thought. He can take my disappointment and turn it around into someone else’s answered prayer. Sure, I was still a bit sad about missing my family’s annual gathering, but I was ecstatic to have some company and make special memories for both households. I ran out to the grocery store to pick up Christmas dinner ingredients.

Oh, but the disappointments weren’t done. Not yet. The day after my grocery shopping spree, my phone rang. My friend was at urgent care with her daughter, who was suffering from an acute illness. It was pretty bad. And highly contagious. My heart sank. I knew what this meant but decided that I would be able to block reality for real this time. Surely our last minute Christmas dinner won’t get cancelled.

Oh, but it would. I got the text just before 6:45 AM Christmas morning. The affected stomach still wasn’t quite up to eating much of anything beyond plain cooked noodles. Sigh…but…I’m a (wholesome) fighter (for the record, NOT stubborn, just perseverant and creative). We’ll just go north and see family after all. The mysterious deflating tire had decided to randomly fix itself a few days before Christmas, and we could pack the portable tire pump just in case. The weather had even cooperated; it was a BEAUTIFUL sunny day with not even a flurry in the forecast. YES! I was going to see my family after all!

I scurried around, waking children up. We quickly opened all the gifts and then clambered into the van. We turned on an assorted Christmas playlist as I reminisced out loud about listening to hours of Amy Grant’s Christmas album in years’ past. You know, when I was a kid.

Oh, but the disappointments weren’t done. Still. We were just about halfway to family when the ride got bumpy. A little too bumpy for the road we were on. And yes, we were still in Pennsylvania, so I did check because as anyone who has travelled through my state knows, Pennsylvania roads are by nature quite bumpy. Then the light started blinking. Check engine, check engine. WHAT?!!!

My hand flew over to my husband’s leg and gave it a few swift pats; he was sitting with headphones on, eyes closed, in the passenger’s seat. “What do I do?!” I was borderline panicking and doing my best to keep reality far away from my brain.

“Pull over.” Of course. So simple. I found a spot with some extra room on the shoulder because, you know, everyone is driving over 65 mph on the highway, and he got out to take a look. Engine misfire. Unknown cause. Possibly something to do with a sparkplug, maybe a computer chip. UGH! I REALLY HATE REALITY SOMETIMES.

A few tears slid down my cheeks as we sat, cold, on the side of the road, wondering if we would be able to avoid large towing fees and a premium car rental fee for an emergency Christmas holiday rental. As the cold seeped through my coat, we decided to try to limp the car home. Away from family. Away from gingerbread men and delicious stuffing. Away from hugs and story swapping. Somehow, I just didn’t feel like singing Christmas songs anymore. Reality was in full barging-in mode.

What a twisty-turny kind of Christmas. A QUIRKY Christmas. Yes! That was it! We reframed Christmas 2024 to the year we built unexpected memories and had a very quirky Christmas. We did it together, as a family, and as a family in that moment we decided that disappointments don’t need to end in bitter tears. Reality may barge in with disappointments, but it doesn’t have to have the final say. Because by the end of that very quirky Christmas we…

1.     Discovered kindness and love of family as they called to see if we needed help, offering to leave their gatherings to come pick us up on the side of the road if needed.

2.     Discovered the power of positive thinking, togetherness, and faith as we regrouped as a family and chose to believe that God has even better things in store. We even had some laughs together on the way home.

3.     Discovered the kindness, spontaneity, and generosity of friends who welcomed us in for an evening of treats, games, and chatter and to tow our car if needed.

4.     Discovered that disappointments don’t have to be the end of the story because in the end there will always be faith, hope, and love.

So, there it is. When reality decides to barge in anyway, we can always trust that God’s got whatever it is, exchange our disappointments for His peace, and know that in the end faith, hope, and love really do remain (1 Cor. 13:13).

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!